What is sex therapy?

Topics:

• Professional Ethics

• Specialized Focus

• Levels of Care

Sex therapy is a form of psychotherapy—or “talk therapy”—in which a trained, preferably certified, sex therapist helps clients address sexual concerns and find practical, healthy solutions.

Before we get into what sex therapy is, let’s clarify what it is not.

❌ What Sex Therapy Is Not

No nudity or sexual contact
It should go without saying, but let’s be clear: there is no nudity or sexual activity of any kind in sex therapy. Sex therapy is not sex surrogacy or sex work. Any professional who crosses these boundaries risks losing both their license and reputation.

No touch
Sex therapy is not a touch-based modality. While other professions—like massage therapy or bodywork—may ethically involve touch, sex therapy does not. The emotional vulnerability involved requires clear, non-negotiable boundaries.

Not just about sex
A trained sex therapist knows when to focus on sex and when to look deeper. Think of it like a repair person fixing a hole in a bedroom wall—they examine not just the wall, but the structure and systems around it. And once the job is done, they don’t linger in the bedroom.

Not medical treatment
Sex therapists don’t diagnose physical conditions or prescribe medication. If there are concerns about medical issues, we’ll encourage you to consult a physician. Our focus is on the mental, emotional, relational, and spiritual aspects of sexual health.

✅ What Sex Therapy Is

Functional Support
Many people seek sex therapy due to changes or challenges in sexual functioning. This can include:

• Low desire/libido

• Desire discrepancies in couples

• Discrepancies in sexual attraction (e.g., mixed-orientation couples)

• Arousal or erection difficulties

• Premature or delayed ejaculation

• Orgasm challenges

• Pain during sexual activity

• Infidelity

• Compulsive sexual behavior

• Gaps in sex education

• Religious or spiritual conflict around sexuality

These concerns often stem from a mix of medical, psychological, relational, or life-stage factors.

🧩 Levels of Treatment: The PLISSIT Model

Sex therapy isn’t one-size-fits-all. Clients vary widely in their needs, comfort, background, and education. Jack Annon’s PLISSIT model helps guide the level of care:

• Permission – Encouragement and support to speak openly about sexual concerns.

• Limited Information – Clear, accurate, and relevant sex education.

• Specific Suggestions – Actionable recommendations tailored to your situation.

• Intensive Therapy – In-depth work for complex, long-standing, or severe issues.

Not everyone needs extensive therapy. We begin at the most basic level and adjust based on your needs.

🔄 Experiential Focus

Therapy isn’t just about talking—it’s about doing. While conversation is important, change requires action. Sex therapists often assign exercises or practices between sessions to help you apply new insights and build new patterns.

🌱 Sexual Health, Not Just Dysfunction

Most people begin therapy because something isn’t working. But sex therapy is also about defining what sexual health looks like for you and identifying practices that lead to thriving, not just surviving.

There you have it—a foundation for understanding what sex therapy is and isn’t. Because of the sensitivity of this work, it’s especially important to find a therapist whose training, personality, and approach align with your needs.

This may have answered some of your questions—or sparked even more. If so, let’s chat.